...ashamed...

I'm truly ashamed at my lack of blogging this month! LOL. I looked at last months numbers...and I blogged 14 times...so far in June...4. HAHA. Well- that's what happens, I guess, when you're sick all day, everyday- and have no energy!

I feel like I've been missing out on alot... fun times w/ my friends who have a million "field trips" planned this summer... playing rough w/ my boy- alot of times, I'll just lay on the floor to play w/ him- and now Jude will lay down next to me to play too- haha!... cuddle time w/ DLo- cuz- I literally might throw up on him! HA! But- I know that it'll wind down- my energy will somewhat return- and HOPEFULLY the sickness will pass!

I do have like 10 blogs in my mind- I'll have to sit down one day and write them all!!!! :D In the meantime...thanks for being patient w/ me!

...i'm what?...

Sigh. This pregnancy is killing me! HAHA...not really- but I've been SO MUCH MORE sick than I was w/ Jude. I pretty much can call it- within 30mins of throwing up. It's so gross. As a matter of fact...I'm calling it right now! LOL. Ew.

Anywho. I thought I'd share the hilarious story of how we found out. It was a Wednesday night...we were at my cousins house after their graduation...and we were eating- (Wong's b/c that's what we ALWAYS eat when I'm w/ my family)... My aunt- who I guess in Korean culture considers herself also Jude's grandma- was doting over Jude and asks... "So...any plan nudda baby?" I give the "oh boy" giggle and say..."No...I dunno if we'll have another baby.." Well. After getting home and putting Jude down to bed... I say to Derrick...."I don't feel pregnant...but...I think I might be late." (Sidenote...and there will be a couple- me being "late" doesn't mean anything b/c I have a wack cycle...TMI?) Then I proceeded to say..."You know...I just...don't know that I want more kids. I mean....I LOVED being pregnant and giving birth...but I just love Jude so so so much...I don't want to share myself w/ anyone else! And....I don't know if I can handle the newbornlackofsleep thing!" (Sidenote- now...it DID take us a long time to conceive Jude...so on one hand- I'm cool w/ having however many kids God blesses us w/.... on the other- I really do love Jude so so so much and dunno if I can handle the newbornlackofsleep thing!!!) Derrick and I have always been on the same page...and he agreed...he wasn't sure how he felt about more kids.

Wow. So...I wake up early Thursday morning. Derrick and I were both sick (from TN) and Derrick had actually went to sleep on the couch (for the first time in our marriage) b/c he couldn't breathe or something (whatever- I was glad b/c he was snoring SO SO SO loud!!!!)... I think to myself...well...I have one pregnancy test left over...might as well take it! Random. Out of the blue. I take it...thinking NOTHING of it. PREGNANT. ?! Huh? PREGNANT. Wait...wait wait....let me get my glasses on. PREGNANT. Laugh. Out. Loud. So...I go to the couch and shake Derrick awake.... "Derrick.....Derrick.....Derrick.....Derrick...I NEED you to get up....... Derrick.....WAKE UP.....Derrick...." He rolls over....and I hold the stick up to his face. Derrick....being the genius that we all love...says..."I can't read it..." LOL! "Derrick...why would I show you a stick that says NOT pregnant?!" "You're pregnant!!?!?!?" "Apparently so!!!" ::tears::

So. After sitting there for what seemed to be an hour....shocked....elated....sad (read my previous pregnancy blog)...shocked...overjoyed...shocked... we finally peeled ourselves off the couch to rejoice! What a miracle and a blessing. God is so good.... now...if He'd just have some mercy on me and help me to stop feeling nauseous and vomiting!!! :D

Derrick has been THE BEST husband ever through this pregnancy...basically everything makes me gag...ESPECIALLY Jude's diapers...wet or dirty! Derrick has changed probably 95% of all diapers in the past month- even coming home for lunch to do a midafternoon shiner change! He's made numerous "runs" for me (Sonic...BaskinRobbins...McD's...etc)...and has picked up the house every single day. Just the other night...he said- "Usually you can tell when you're sick...but you're just like 'Whatever' and act normal....but...I can tell you're really sick b/c...the house looks EXACTLY the same when I come home as it does when I leave in the mornings- You haven't done ANYTHING!" LOL! And it's true...I pretty much have JUUUUUUST enough energy to take care of/play w/ Jude...eat...and vomit. LOL. I try to pick up things here and there or empty the dishwasher or do the laundry or whatever...but napping just sounds SO MUCH BETTER! Heehee! Derrick's been great! :D I love that man!

...6.21.03...

Six years. That's how long we've been married. I cannot believe it. On one hand, it feels like it was just yesterday...on the other, if feels like it's been a million years! But. I can honestly say....that I married the man of my dreams...my best friend for life.... and even though I give DLo the HARDEST time....I love him w/ all my heart.

...BabyLogan2.0...

Well. I'm pregnant. Wow. I still don't fully believe it...but it's true! Derrick, Jude, and I went to the Dr.'s today and got to see the lil heartbeat. So. It's official. I'm pregnant. Now...I've got to say...I have a gamut of emotions about it.... most revolving around shock and guilt- shock b/c we weren't trying and it had taken us so long to conceive Jude- and guilt that I'm not happier. Not that I'm not happy- I totally am...but there is a teeny part of me that is sad that my time being JUDE'S mommy (as opposed to Jude and BabyL2.0's mommy) is coming to an end! I digress.

So far...this pregnancy has been pretty different from Jude's. W/ Jude, I was kinda "blah" in the mornings, but I'd be fine by the time I started work...I was tired ALL the time...I would randomly feel like throwing up, then do it and feel great. This time around- I feel "blah" all the time- all day and all night- everyday. Yuck. And...I've thrown up probably more times already than I did the entire time w/ Jude. Ew. I think part of it feels worse too b/c I have a baby to watch...I can't just mope around and feel yucky- I have to roll around and play w/ my lil man! Haha. But...I know it'll only be for a little while...I'm super excited to get big and fat and feel the baby moving. I'm also excited to see Jude be a big brother! :D

Let's see... I'm almost 9 weeks. My due date is January 20th. The babies will be about 20/21months apart. We're NOT finding out again- b/c it was SO SO SO fun not knowing w/ Jude. Um. I guess that's it???? :D Life is about to get alot more...fun? hectic? blessed? Yup. All of those! :D

...tore up...

So. We are officially walking now. Not ALL the time, but most of the time. And....you might know- this is the time when booboo's start appearing. Well...he got quite the booboo- Jude biffed it in the rocks yesterday at his grandparent's house. My beautiful son's face is a mess. It breaks my heart... I just hope it heals okay!!! :(