I know alot of you have been waiting for an Emme blog! I have LITERALLY had it on my "todo" list to sit and write this down...mostly b/c I don't ever ever ever wanna forget it...but also b/c I wanted to share with you my amazing experience...but you know how it is!
Emme Ann Logan
01.19.10
1:19pm
8lbs 15oz ~ 21in
Wow, Miss Emme. For as much suffering I went through with my pregnancy...my labor and delivery was a completely different story. I was induced with Jude...not my ideal way of giving birth...and I was hoping that "2.0" would come earlier to avoid being induced again. The days dragged on...and I was getting closer to my due date. I had my final appointment scheduled for Tuesday (the 19th) where we would be scheduling the induction. ...but...
I got up several times during the night to go potty. Typical for a pregnant lady, right? Well...I got up at 3:55am to do my bidness again. I remember being surprised that Jude hadn't come visit us through the night... I was just finishing peeing...when I heard a popping sound in my belly...but it being 4am, I didn't think too much about it. When I was "done"...I noticed...I was still peeing. I tell Derrick, "uh...I think my water broke..." Now...I must say that Derrick sleeps like a rock...and I was surprised when he answered me right away... but then...I clenched- to stop "peeing"...and I did! So then I had to tell DLo that maybe I hadn't broken my water...well...I'll spare the details...eventually, I realized that it was indeed my water that broke. !!! Yippee!!! 1. I finally got to say "It's TIME!" (since I didn't w/ Jude) 2. Yea! that it broke when I was on the toilet as opposed to laying in bed or on the couch or at the store or whatever!!! We immediately call my parents so that one of them could stay at the house while Jude sleeps...then called Tori (DLo's sister- who is a l/d nurse) and our moral support in the delivery room (she was there for Jude's birth too!)... I hop in the shower (cuz I was lookin' ROUGH)...blow dry my hair...get some makeup on...throw some last minute things in the bag...sort the laundry...order Derrick around to pick up the kitchen...have an emotional "goodbye and sorry I'm going to change your life" moment with Jude and finally at 5:15am, we're out the door!
My dad showed up at some point in my rushing around...and he was hilarious. My dad is the nervous type. He freaks out whenever we are travelling...he worries when I'm home alone...he calls to make sure we're OK during a storm...he's just a cutie. So...when his "Sweetie Pea Pumpkin Pie" calls to say she's in labor... LOL. Well...you can imagine...he said he didn't even know what to do after we called...didn't know how to get ready...and as we were leaving...he just had this blank look on his face...surely worrying that everything would go okay!
Anywho...we go to McD's to pick up breakfast...and I'm finally feeling contractions. Yipes. I'm kinda freaking out b/c they're coming every 3/4 mins consistently. I'm on the phone with Tori, as Derrick is ordering...he's cracking us both up b/c he's telling the lady taking our $$$ that my water broke...and she either 1. doesn't understand or 2. doesn't care. LOL...and then he proceeds to telling the lady giving us our food the same thing. Awww- DLo! He's so excited! :)
We get to the hospital at around 6:00am. It's been 2 hours since my water broke. Tori is already there waiting for me w/ a wheelchair. While DLo parks, this super elderly lady (who works at the hospital) wheels me upstairs to the maternity ward. Um. It was hilarious- b/c I'm not so much what you would call...a small sorta lady...haha! Anywho. By the time we got up there...Derrick had already parked and was right behind us (which adds to the hilarity of the above mental picture)... we get all checked in...and it's "Go Time"...
Triage Room: Wow. So. Putting on the beloved gown after your water broke is pretty gross. But other than that part of it...everything just seemed so stinkin' familiar. I can't believe it was only 20 monthsish ago that I was here...doing this for the first time w/ Jude! The triage nurse comes in...let's call her Brunhilda...she goes over a bunch of questions w/ me...one being: "Do you want an epidural?"... My answer to her is: "No I don't, but I don't know..." My reasoning: I've always wanted to do it w/o one. I want to do it She-Ra style. I want to feel the pain...I want to be able to say I did it w/o an epi. Yes. I'm insane. But...I think I have a pretty high tolerance for pain...so whatev. But. I'm also not 100% opposed to getting one. If it hurts....well...we'll just make it not hurt! Anywho. Brunhilda gets the IV ready for me. Yuck. I hate needles...really though...who does?! Now. As Brunhilda is preparing to stick me w/ the IV thingy...I'm staring at the wall opposite of whatever is going on w/ my hand...and I'm looking at a poster that says "What is your pain level?" ...and then it shows little faces ranging from smiling (no pain) to squinty-eyed-red-cheeked (mega pain) and numbers ranging from 0-10... as she sticks me- I immediately look at "mega pain" face...b/c goodNIGHT does it hurt! (this coming from the girl who just typed ta ht she has a high tolerance for pain!) Then Brunhilda comments, as my hand is dripping in blood, that she's always so "messy" when putting in the IV's. Seriously?! Can Tori just do it, please?!?! It is at this point she asks on a scale of 1-10 how painful my contractions are. I hate this question. How am I supposed to know? I mean. It doesn't feel like nothing....but it's not like my eyes are bulging out of my head...but then...what if this is the worst it's going to be? what if it's not? So. I say..."I dunno, a 2? But my hand is at a 10..." and then I point to the poster on the wall...which makes Tori laugh... :)
Okay- So. My hand pretty much hurt...the entire labor...except when my contractions were hurting so bad that all other pains kinda disappeared! When they checked me in Triage...I was a 5! AHHH! That. Is. Nutz. When I went in with Jude, granted- I was induced- I was a 3...it took me HOURS to get to 5 and then I just stayed there... So...I knew that that meant my labor was not going to last too too long. (I was "in labor" with Jude for 12 hours- not that all of it counts since they took me off Pitocin and I wasn't really having any contractions) Before moving me to my labor room...Brunhilda asks me if I want to go ahead and get my epidural now. ::grr:: First of all...did you not listen when I said I didn't want one? Second of all...I said my pain was a 2...a TWO...why would I want one now if I'm fine???
L/D Room: Once again it was really weird being moved into such a familiar room. All I kept thinking was...Derrick better not sleep the day away again! :) I must say...one of the BIGGEST perks to not getting an epidural is that you get to move around! YES! I went pee whenever I wanted...I got to walk the halls...I could get up and dance if I wanted! It was fabulous! Tori and I had a little routine down...we'd walk for 15 mins, then I'd sit on the ball for 15 mins...then I had to be monitored for 15 mins...we'd repeat one more time and then I would have to lay down to be monitored for 30 mins. It was nice. My contractions were getting yuckier...but nothing too bad...I was at a point where I didn't understand what the big deal was...I've had diarrhea pains that were worse! Poor DLo...I gave him such a hard time about sleeping so much w/ Jude...but really...Tori was doing all the work for him! He enjoyed it though, I think, having time "off". Every time I had to lay down to be monitored...I was checked...and each time...I was another cm. This was awesome! Progress! I spent alot of time texting my girlfriends at school to keep them up to date and at some point my momma came to the hospital. With Jude...since he was our first...we wanted it to be a Kim/Derrick thing. We asked our families to stay home until we called them to let them know it was okay to come (besides Tori- who was w/ us during the l/d for Jude too)...we wanted to have our baby and then spend some time as a family together before the paparazzi bombarded us! :) But...this time...I didn't care who wanted to come in...but specifically invited my mom and motherinlaw (Melody couldn't, though, b/c she was watching Jude).
Anywho. Once I got to an 8...I kinda seemed stuck. Tori predicted around 11am that I would give birth by 1pm- according to my progress...but it seemed that 8cm was going to be the death of me. Contractions were harder, but still manageable....then....at 12:13pm, I sent my final text update to the girls..."So much friggin' pain..." I got to the point where I went into turtle mode...whenever I'm in pain- I want no one to touch me and no one to utter a sound. It was hilarious...b/c my mom is not known for being quiet...I had to shush her a couple times. And then DLo was eating a yogurt parfait...and he dumps the granola in and stirs it...and I'm not gunna lie- it was THE loudest thing ever! He got a stern SHHHH! ...at which my mom gives him a look and they both bust out laughing. I woulda laughed too...if I didn't feel like I was going to double over in pain! Thank goodness though, for 1. our iPod: which had an awesome playlist that I had made before going into labor w/ Jude- everytime I had a contraction, I'd close my eyes and sing the song in my head...2. Tori: who would remind me to relax my shoulders, where I distributed my pain..and then my eyebrows where I would move it after relaxing my shoulders... 3. Karen, the l/d nurse: who was a God send all around! When my contractions got really bad, Karen would do deep breathing...and I'd mimic her...and it relaxed me to the point of falling asleep in between contractions (that um...were coming 2 minutes apart!!!). Wow.
At some point, Karen checked me again. She felt like the baby was moving towards "sunnysideup" so she suggested I lay on my other side to see if the baby would flip back. Not only did the baby flip back...but within 15 mins I knew that it was time! Tori had been asking me all along- do you feel pressure? Do you feel like you need to poop? Um...yes? I dunno! Yeah- I knew! It was about 1pm at this point...and they call my Dr. The only problem is...it only took 3 pushes w/ Jude...annnnd...I'm ready NOW! The pain was unbelievable. My mom- who was busy being a wallflower the entire day- rushed to my side and grabbed my hands. Now...you may think that I would have wanted to hold DLo's hands...but there is something about my momma...her hands are so strong...that was comforting...something about her saying to "be strong" in Korean...that gave me strength. :) It was comforting to hear Derrick telling me that I'm doing good- and that he was proud of me- and that I WAS strong.
So. My mom is holding my hands w/ a deathgrip...Derrick is saying comforting things...and I'm about to black out. I kept telling Tori- I NEED TO POOP OR PUSH, I NEED TO POOP OR PUSH! It was quite sad, actually...I also said that I either needed to get this baby out or needed an epidural! lol. I finally asked "How much longer?!" Meaning- how much longer do I need to wait until the Dr. gets there to push?! They told me the hospital's on-call Dr. was 1min away...and mine was 5mins away- and I told them...I want the 1min away one!!! I remember someone saying something about how I was doing great waiting (I could have cut them) and that they would really rather MY Dr. deliver the baby...and very pitifully...I said..."but she's not even my Dr! Dr. Shannon's my Dr, but she's really sick!" So sad. Just get this kid outta me already! Dr. R the on-call chick came. And...I could have kicked her in the face, if my legs weren't vibrating off my body from trying to NOT push. She walks in like it's no big thing that this 10ft Asian girl is holding in her child with no epidural to block the pain. "Let's just see what happens" she says. GRRR. I NEED TO POOP OR PUSH! Tori kept saying "Your body's gunna do what it needs to do"...which was code for...JUST PUSH! (Which I didn't know! LOL) Finally...after holding it for 20 mins...Karen (I think) said...she needs to do this. They finally get me on my back and I GET TO PUSH! Praise. The. Lord.
Now...w/ Jude...I had to push at each contraction and then stop when the contraction was over and push again at the next one. I figured it would be the same way...nope. I pushed and started to stop...and they said- No- keep going you're almost done! ?! Seriously. So I continued pushing and VOILA! (Apparently there was a super tight knot in the cord...thank you, Lord for protecting myself and my baby...b/c they were all shocked and amazed that there was no trauma to the baby)
At this point- everything seemed to be in "superfastinyourface" mode. My Dr. walked in right as the baby was coming out...the on-call Dr. shoved the baby in my face so DLo could say "IT'S A GIRL!" Which took me a few more times to process...I was so confused! Did I seriously already finish pushing her out??? Did you seriously FINALLY let me push??? Even as they placed this "freshoutoftheoven" lovebucket in my arms...I just didn't understand what had happened!
IT'S A GIRL! I was right! YES!
So. No epidural? Good call? Yes. Now...although I had painful contractions at the end...the rest was manageable. The only part that hurt like the dickens was when they made me NOT push. No person should ever go through that. It was great being able to get up out of bed by myself (and not having Big Bertha being called on the try to get my big body into a wheelchair!!!) and go to the bathroom...and seriously...after you push the baby out...the pain is totally gone! If we have another child...I'll def. try to do no epidural again...but...like always...I'm not 100% opposed to one either!
Thank you, Lord...for a pretty smooth and quick delivery. Thank you for the people who were there with me that day...my husband, Tori, my mom, and Karen. Most of all...thank you for blessing me with another beautiful and perfect child...for trusting Derrick and I to be her parents...
